maybe i'll melt

  

Azure eyes and thick lips. My gaze upon you, frozen.

I learned the sweet, earthy smell of your skin; two years flew, still look to you, frozen.

The early morning seeps into my chest and icicles cling tight to my lungs.

To say I don’t like the feeling would be untrue; am I frozen?

I stopped wearing the sun in my eyes for you, did you know?

You knew it, and I know you knew it too. Now we’re frozen.

I sip and feel the hot, honey-sweetened tea burn my chest.

They melt these icicles. A brief rescue. Anti-frozen.

I still find it incredible to think about the miracle that is life.

Don’t forget that although it may seem like it’s true, you are not frozen.

___________________

Dear all my beautiful blog friends,

I'm still here, despite my reoccurring absences - I'm sorry! I have not had the best of months and consequently my writing has suffered. I am here, and won't leave for good. University is back on track and difficult. My poetics course is really interesting and has opened me up to many other forms other than prose poetry. This week we studied the Ghazal, a difficult pre-Islamic Persian form invoking melancholy, love and longing. The poem above is my take on the Ghazal. Let me know what you think of it. 

I have missed you all and hope you are all well & happy!

Thank you for your amazingly kind responses about my photo, I am so flattered! Here is another photo, I hope you like it.

Frightened

It frightens me to think that you when you breathe, your hot breath exhales into the air of somewhere I am not. We once shared breaths as I grew inside your womb; my flesh is your flesh. The warm blood that runs through your veins run through my own. Your caring, kind nature dances with my spirit. My memories of your motherly nurturing and love escape me not, will escape me never. And this is why even though you are not physically here in this country anymore, you never actually left. You'll always be with me.
This thought makes my cracked lips turn into a smile, and I want you to hug me like the time I stuck my finger in the airport luggage conveyer belt even though you told me not to. I was being silly and naughty, but you didn't punish me; you hugged me. It hurts that I cannot hug you now, but I know everything will be okay. I miss you.




This photo is by me. I never use my own photos, but I want to show you now and tell you that my other passion besides writing is photography. I will show you more soon.

paper boat

we sailed away on a paper boat on the quiet, grey sea away from all that can hurt.

we always found peace in a war zone, you and i, but now as we float along to our calm everything seems to crack before us in a way it never did before.

screams become mere hot breaths as the sea tries to swallow us. our paper boat starts to leak; so heavy, soggy. our snowy white saviour turns ghostly, ashen, and unfolds to the saturnine waves. breaths are weak, our bones brittle as we lay on the sinking paper. our hands interlock, each created for the other. we always pushed each other up to the surface so one of us could breathe, but we were both drowning now. our tresses flow in the water like we wish our existence did, harmoniously dancing with the sea. as we descend our lost eyes close and you whisper,

wir will nur schlafen, bitte lass uns schlafen

wir will nur schlafen, bitte lass uns schlafen

finally at peace, we fall asleep with the waves, our paper boat disintegrated and cold. 

schlafen, für immer schlafen in einer welt nicht für uns.


words by me.

read more 

photo by dan estabrook 

robert moses joyce

robert moses joyce's photography
"his photographs... technicolor hallucinations and reveries of the netherworld..."

you can find robert's magical flickr here 

the queenslander

in search for a lovely place to live, my boyfriend and i took a long drive to the city and looked at houses. the first place was run-down and had an eerie feel, the second was a lovely modern apartment but costs too much, and the third was this amazing old, renovated queenslander; high-set, beautiful veranda, white ceiling roses & white wood panel walls, an old stone fireplace and wooden floors. we are sharing with a two lovely ladies (i wish we could afford a house like this on our own) and can move in anytime, now we have to decide when!

i'd also like to send my best wishes and hope to all the sufferers of the queensland floods. the floods, now dubbed the 'in-land tsunami', has now inundated three-quarters of queensland, with the death toll currently at 10 and suspected of rising. my heart goes out to the families and i hope this watery hell ends soon. please donate here.

photos by
risa i 
smdoc 
natasa azdic 

untitled

your words fly past me like wind. eyes stare deep within you, i see through your black eyes and see nothing but darkness; a dark room with a tiny beating heart floating in empty space. it's poisoned, befoul. you scream as the beating heart dies, but the wind steals your voice and all i see if your mouth lock open, teeth bared. you fall to the icy ground and your black eyes die, and the honey-brown i once loved returns. your breath is slow and short. snow covers you, bonding to the stands of your hair, your long eyelashes. it melts on your hot lips, freezes on your cold heart. soon you are all but a white blanket of snow, part of the earth. i bend down and kiss your still-hot lips with my own, and sit by as your lips turn cold too. i close my eyes and see your honey eyes, but my tears wipe, smear the image from the screen like rain on a window. tears become a river and the beating heart beneath my dry bones becomes smaller, smaller. blacker, and blacker. poison.

photo by alison scarpulla 

happy new year

today has been the perfect summer day. you can smell the salt from the ocean in the breeze, the whirring sound of the ceiling fan calms you, the cicadas are singing so loud it almost hurts your ears, the sea is sapphire blue & the water feels like velvet, you can feel the sun burn your skin as you lay on the verandah eating cold watermelon that makes your teeth twinge, salt & sand sticks to your back, and droplets of sweat gather on the inside of your bent knees as the sun glares off your shiny skin.

today is new years eve and it's crazy to think about how the year has flown by. next year brings huge changes; i move to the big city, away from my family and small beach town, and i start university. i'm scared but very excited.

this evening my boyfriend and i are going to the night markets and fun fair, and then going to my friend's new years eve party - i hope it will be a nice, laid-back evening.

whatever way you choose to spend your night, whether it's out in the wild, crazy night or inside snuggled up with a movie, i wish you a beautiful night. happy new year!

photos by
petracollins
jack
natalia peris 

auburn and ivory

once when I saw her there

white light she stood so still

warming her eyes to the sea

hardly her way to be free

auburn and ivory

heart break and pony tails

holding her bones by a fire

writing the letter she sails

white page turns golder lights

wanting her one sacrifice

auburn and ivory

heart break and pony tails.

lyrics by beach house
photo by maple stars 

..

it's one of those days where you're just content staying in bed all day staring mindlessly at the tv. outside is sunless and a gentle wind makes the leaves dance. inside the doona is cool against my cheeks and the quiet buzz of the television is calming.

i hope you are having a lovely christmas eve,

photos by

utter otter 

lovelyoverdose 
emma parry